The other day, a family member (and mom of two boys) told me that she now knows why they say boys are made of “snakes and snails and puppy dog tails”. I always saw myself as the mom of boys. I grew up around them, wore their clothes and liked their games. Don’t get me wrong, I like pretty things, but I’m not too girly & like to get my hands dirty.
When I was pregnant though, I was convinced I was having a girl and my outlook changed. We tend to stay pretty gender neutral in our house and will always let our kids be who they choose to be (rather than trying to shape them into someone society thinks they should be). However, with my hormones peaking, I went crazy. I thrifted the cutest vintage dresses and shoes, and dreamt about the bows I would put in her hair and the girly things I would do with her. We would go on picnics, pick flowers and I would start painting my nails just so we could do it together. When I found out I was having a boy, I debated still putting the dresses on him…they were just SO cute.
However, now that Judah is here, 7 months old, growing, crawling, standing, babbling, I could never imagine him as anything or anyone other than himself. No matter how gender neutral we keep things, he is a boy through and through. Squealing, screaming, into everything, dirty, crazy as hell and a boob man (for now at least)! The way he looks intriguingly at me when I speak is as if he is madly in love and I’m saying the most important thing in the world. I don’t have to wonder because I can literally feel how much he loves me and it melts my heart. I never knew I had so much love to give until he came along.
This past week, after a walk with his Yaya, he came back inside holding a little yellow flower that most would call a weed. When he saw me, he smiled the biggest two-tooth grin, reached out for me and dropped the flower on my lap. It was perfect, just like him. I pressed it in a book and will show him one day when he has kids of his own just how much I’ve cherished everything he has touched since the day he was born.
We’ve been in South Carolina visiting family for the past 10 days and just in that short span of time, he has become more of a little boy than a baby. Over the years, he will continue to change, grow, and develop into a little man and I’m looking forward to every minute & milestone. There is honestly nothing like having a little mama’s boy though & I hope he stays that way forever.